So, you’ve taken the plunge and decided to set up a profile on one of those taboo fetish websites; as such, you want to stand out and show a little bit of your personality. Just keep in mind, in your desperate need to barf your unique self-image onto the internets, you may want to consider a few things. Here are the top 10 do’s and don’ts in setting up profiles on fetish site.
1. LOLCats and Demotivaters are funny, great for blogs and 4chan forums, but they are not good for profile sites and don’t mesh well when accompanied alongside people in latex dog suits and ass-less leather pants. People visit these sites to find out who you are, and unless you’re a kitten who really likes “cheese burgers”, it only speaks to your desperate need for attention. Keep your images relevant.
2. It’s great that you’ve taken the time to find a photographer willing to take pictures of your leather cladded ass, but please keep in mind, you do not need to upload the entire photo album. That picture, where your hand is slightly askew from the other picture you just uploaded, is only a waste of space. A profile made up of 1000 images only tells me that you’re self-obsessed and unable to make choices. Choose your best material! Quality over quantity.
3. Do not upload pictures of yourself with your family. In the off chance that the “partner of your dreams” does find your profile, they do not want a picture of your grandma interfering with their imagination. Keep her out of your albums unless you’re offering her up in a 3 way; in which case, please avoid my profile. This also includes Mr. Muggles, your Yorkshire terrier; though he`s very cute, he’s hopefully not part of your sex life.
4. Don’t use other people’s pictures for your profile. And if you’re using pictures of people that you have taken, but are not in, please make mention of that. Nobody wants to buy a porn magazine, and then discover it’s filled with pictures of William Donohue. I know were not all super models, including myself at a sexy 5’5 (hobbits represent!), but you need to be honest in your profile. Those pictures you found online belong to other people, get your own and keep your collection of masturbation material on your iPad.
5. Profile sites are not friend contests, slow down and READ other peoples profiles. If you have 500 people marked as friends, there is something wrong with your method; you’re missing the point. If you have no intentions of engaging that person, then all you’re doing is collecting thumbnail sized porn of people from the other side of the planet.
6. Spelling and grammar DO matter. We live in 2012 and open office is free. I’m not saying you have to write with the eloquence of Stephen Fry, but atrocious spelling and grammar says to me that you don’t care about little details, like making sure the gear you just put somebody in has air holes, and understanding that when they say “does this look infected to you?”, it means the chastity belt needs to come off. I know this might come as a surprise, but most of the best writers have other people double check their work, so having your roommate or web friend check your profile for mistakes is a good thing. And for those on the other side of the fence, let the little things go. Writing in a casual form does not mean the world is going to end.
7. I do not need your life story. Tell me a few fun facts about yourself that define your PERSONALITY and what you would like to find. I don’t want to know that your 3rd grade teacher gave you 3 gold stars and that you once lost your watch trying to feed a camel in 1983. Your profile should be short enough that I don’t get bored, but not so short that it looks like a twitter. If I wanted to read endless, over descriptive diatribe, I would buy a book by Margaret Atwood.
8. The MOOD your profile presents matters, so don’t be arrogant. Nobody is the king of the fetish world, your poetry might suck and nobody likes somebody who can’t stop complimenting themselves. This goes in the other direction as well; rambling on about how nobody loves you is not going to result in somebody wanting to meet you in real life.
9. Interact! If you don’t want people bugging you, go find a porn site. If somebody messages you in a polite manner, say hello back; you cannot catch cooties through email. Even if they are 3 times your age, twice your height and have an unusually large collection of glass coffee tables, it does not mean they are inhuman monsters (well some of them might be); you`re not obligated to meet them in person. It’s good form to say hello back. As for those who have the courage to speak up, say hello, once, not 34 times in 12 minutes. And do so in a manner that does not give them the impression that you would like to keep them in a pit, in your basement, feeding them bottles of lotion with a basket on a string, with the intention adding them to your fall line.
10. Have a sense of humour about what you’re into and who you are. The ability to make fun of your self is one of the most attractive things you can do on a profile site, it smells of self-confidence and tells people that you’re not living in your own little delusional world, where you think dressing up like a latex duck (some people might be into that?) and rolling around in Jell-O, is not a laughing matter. IT IS!
It’s no wonder social conservatives refer to the internet as their worst nightmare, it allows all the masses access to a uninhibited tool to feed their unique fantasies . Certainly there have always been people into bondage and rubber for as long as the materials have been available, but with this rallying ability to explore and solidify others, people have discovered visual and physical scenes that might have been otherwise lost to obscurity.
The idea of being a toy like figure is not something lost on me, in fact, the logo on this website is based on the blend of the cute and macabre. The dehumanizing mindset that allows a person the freedom to trust you like they would a teddy bear, which blends well in the fetish spectrum. Where once you had access to a hand full of fantasies, now you can mix them to create your own kinky collage.
Mike is one of those who has evolved to produce his own flavor, one that he is not alone in enjoying. A blend of animal role play, furry, bondage and enclosure, he has brought to life the ability to take the term “human toy” to the next level by actually building a wearable, lockable, heavily stuffed, wonderfully simplifies, object.
Taking on the appropriate screen name “Plushomancer”, Mike shared with us a few of the joys and tribulations of his playfully cumbersome interactions.
“The down side is that its a newer kink and few seem to be able to wrap their mind around it. Plush suits can be very difficult to wear. They’re warmer and heavier than a regular costume, and depending on how they are built, they can be more difficult to clean. Its an acquired taste, I would not recommend it unless you have a good heat tolerance.
The internet has helped me learn and look for others. You would be surprised how many are overjoyed to open up, thanking me for giving them a chance to explore. I’m certainly not the first to touch ground on this kind of play, but I’m more than happy to help others find their soft side.
I would say for me it’s a lifestyle. I make the plush suits, promote it and people love it. So yes, I spend a large amount of time helping others to becoming a stuffed toy along with my wife.“
There is certainly a cross over between these costumes and those found among furries, these seem to less about getting in touch with your animals fantasies, and more focused on bringing something almost Calvin and Hobbes like into fruition.
Nick, no doubt, stands out in his home state of Georgia. As part of this tight knit community, he shared with us one of his first experiences in a toy costume.
“The first time I went out in costume and got pictures with a couple other stuffed toy costumers, there was a good number of people who were curious. A lot of people had never seen or heard of our plush style suits before; they looked at the suits and ask questions about how warm it was and how it was constructed.“
I could not help but wonder if, with all the time put into these costumes, if their were any social issues surrounding.
“My family does not know about the suit, the kink, or much of anything related. They don’t have any reason to know, and they would likely give me grief if they did, but it’s what I enjoy and their acceptance of it is not necessary. For me, I believe it adds to my life. I was already fairly happy, and this just makes it more fun, kinky and cute.“
Fetishes often evolve in people rather quickly. Somebody might start off in the bondage scene, and find themselves exploring one kink after another. It did not surprise me that where giant living toys roamed, those into age role play were not far behind. I think Mat was one of the more enthusiastic people I talked to on the subject,
“We threw a party, including some in the age play scene. During these parties, we typically put on a kids movie that has just been released, usually something from a Disney. I was in the suit, and at some point, ended up seated on the sofa doing my best to watch the movie with two others. It started with them merely sitting alongside me, mostly upright. At some point, during the movie, they cuddled closer and rested their heads on my belly to watch the rest of film, I could not help but put my paws around them. It was there that I think I could legitimately say that I found my ‘plush head-space’ and had the warmest feelings about being a soft toy. I kind of gave up actively watching tv, forgot about any discomfort I might have been experiencing, and spent the remaining time just being a stuffed dragon for them.
I think that stuffed animals are awesome. They are the child’s companion, confidant, protector, and playmate. They are soft, cuddly, fun, and take the rigors of childhood with aplomb. Given the chance to become a stuffed critter, to take on those roles and attributes, it seems difficult to refuse.
I can remember dancing at a night club in costume. People seemed happy to play along with my cumbersome form: such as the time I accidentally turned off the lights of the stairwell. I had one of the doormen smiling and chiding me. And interestingly enough, at the same club, where—after I shed my plush body to cool off, and went back on the dance floor—I had a doorman express a level of disappointment that I wasn’t still in suit; i could not help but take satisfaction in that.
I can say that I have come to appreciate what comes under the umbrella of “bondage”. I find myself drawn to situations where I am deprived of a physical freedom, whether it’s a restrictive sight from a hood, touch or manipulation through my mitts, or movement from restraints of various kinds, I enjoy the fact that I can’t put on or take off the toy without the help of a third party”
I honestly find myself wondering how fetishes like these, which often have a lot of depth and seem in tune with the human condition are not more common. We live in a society where I think most keep themselves in check, and never ask why. Perhaps we need to shed the idea that fetishes are purely a sexual goal, or perhaps we need to consider that Dr Freud was right in assuming that at the heart of all of our ambitions, is a sexual motivation.
Though their goal is to be seen as inanimate, it still wonderfully nice knowing that the people playing the part of the cotton batting are often as diverse, driven and complex as anybody you might know. Capable of all the same needs, problems and potentials as anybody.
Howdy Taboobians! No, Taboo Terminal has not gone the way of the Dodo Bird. I had considered letting it go, but after further consideration, and a couple of angry emails, I’ve decided to bring on other writers and join forces. I have a few people working over the idea in their head, but if anybody is interested, please feel free to contact me.
All that said, comments are back up! I was having an issue with spammers that were getting the better of me, and because of the frankensteined template, integrating the spam filter was becoming difficult. I hope to add the option of a twitter login, later on.
As for content, some is coming, but I could always use your suggestions. Find an artist that needs featuring? Odd video? Post idea? Need advise? Or are you just so damn amazing that you think people need to bask in your glow? Then feel free to email me through the contact form or donate through paypal so we can keep this site running. It runs on beer and blackberry wine.
So keep on checking in, don’t forget to subscribe to my rss feed and listen through my twitter under @puckerpup. And keep the angry and pleasant messages coming.
The dreamy and professional work of Steven Kauk is one my recent discoveries through his Deviant Art account. Though, I’m starting to suspect that rabbit pictured below, might not be the real easter bunny. Much rather, the by product of what happens when you get caught stealing his eggs.
All Images are posted with the permission of the artist.
For those of you unaware of the famed “Dan Savage”, he is, without a doubt, one of the blogging pillars of the gay rights movement. Recently he posted a response to the question “Is Folsom Street Fair Relevant”. His answer went straight to the point…
I was wondering what you think about the Folsom Street Fair, the annual gay leather/fetish/BDSM street fair in San Francisco. Do you think it is still a socially relevant display? Or do you think that in this time when we are fighting for civil rights and equality that it does more harm than good?
Better Displaying San Francisco
I’m pretty sure that the Folsom Street Fair remains socially relevant—and highly so—to folks in the leather/fetish/BDSM scene in San Francisco. It’s also relevant to anyone who believes in freedom of sexual expression. (For an idea of what Folsom looks like, and to see the scale of the thing, search for “Folsom Street Fair” on YouTube.)
And it’s important to emphasize that the Folsom Street Fair, which took place last weekend, isn’t exclusively gay. Thousands of straight kinksters attend every year. About the only difference between the straight attendees and the queer ones is that no one claims that the kinky straight people at Folsom make all heterosexuals everywhere look like sex-crazed sadomasochists. (For the record: Sex-crazed sadomasochists are my favorite kind of sadomasochists.)
Straight people, of course, aren’t fighting for their fundamental civil rights. Kinky straights can marry in all 50 states, after all, and no one is pledging to kick kinky straights out of the armed forces or to write anti-kinky-straight bigotry into the US Constitution. So maybe it’s not the same—maybe it’s not as politically risky—when straight people come out in bondage gear, leather chaps, and pony masks. But straight people are a big part of Folsom, too.
But you didn’t ask about kinky straight people. You wondered if the Folsom Street Fair was harming the struggle for LGBT equality.
The Folsom Street Fair has taken place on a Sunday in September in San Francisco every year since 1984. Pride parades have been taking place on a Sunday in June in cities all over the country since the early 1970s. And every year, we hear from concern trolls about the damage that’s supposedly being done to the LGBT rights movement by all those drag queens, go-go boys, dykes, and leather guys at Pride or Folsom or International Mr. Leather.
But everyone acknowledges—even our enemies—that the gay rights movement has made extraordinary strides in the 43 years since the Stonewall Riots in New York City. We’re not all the way there yet, we have yet to secure our full civil equality, but the pace of progress has been unprecedented in the history of social justice movements. The women’s suffrage movement, for example, was launched in the United Sates in 1848. It took more than 70 years to pass the 19th Amendment, which extended the vote to women. In 1969, at the time of the Stonewall Riots, gay sex was illegal in 49 states. Gay sex is now legal in every US state, gay marriage is legal in six states and our nation’s capital (and in all of Canada), and gays, lesbians, and bisexuals can serve openly in the military. (The armed forces still discriminate against trans people.) And we’ve made this progress despite fierce opposition from the religious right, a deadly plague that wiped out a generation of gay men, and—gasp—all those leather guys at Folsom and the go-go boys and drag queens at Pride.
We couldn’t have come so far, so fast if Folsom or pride parades were harming our movement. And I would argue that leather guys, dykes on bikes, go-go boys, and drag queens have actually helped our movement, BDSF. They demonstrate to all people that our movement isn’t just about the freedom to be gay or straight. Our movement is about the freedom to be whatever kind of straight, gay, lesbian, bi, or trans person you want to be. And freedom, as Dick Cheney famously said, means freedom for everyone—from pantsuit-wearing POS sellouts like Mary Cheney and Chris Barron to kinky straight people and hot gay boys in harnesses.
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that cities with big pride parades and events like Folsom are more tolerant and more accepting of sexual minorities than cities that don’t have big gay parades and fetish street fairs. If an event like Folsom were actually counterproductive, BDSF, you would expect San Francisco to be less tolerant and less likely to back equal rights for sexual minorities, not more likely.
And finally, BDSF, any attempt to shut down the Folsom Street Fair—or to ban drag queens, go-go boys, dykes on bikes, or leather guys from pride parades—would be so poisonously divisive that it would do more harm to our movement than a thousand Folsom Street Fairs ever could.